Source: theblemish.com

Rihanna thinks Chris Brown leaked those nude photos of her all over the internet so now she’s devised an elaborate revenge scheme which involves leaking unflattering nude pictures of Chris Brown. So clever.

‘She has less than flattering nude pictures of him that she plans on leaking, says a well-placed source. ‘Rihanna says he’d be really embarrassed by them.’

‘Another thing she’s been talking about is spreading rumours about Chris,’ says the friend. ‘She wants to ruin his sexy image by letting it be known that he was a bit of a novice in the bedroom when they met and that she taught him everything he knows.’

In theory, finding out that after Chris prematurely ejaculates over your thigh, you might be used as his post-coital punching bag for thirty minutes to vent his frustrations out on might be the proverbial nail in the coffin. Judging by the comments from fervent fans, however, Brown could stab a newborn kitten with a screwdriver and they would somehow reason that the cat deserved it and that we shouldn’t be too hard on him because he has a nice ass.

Source: theblemish.com

In a startling move, the DA has notified Rihanna’s lawyer that the singer will be subpoenaed at the next court hearing, meaning, she will be required to testify against Chris Brown. The judge also rejected a motion by Brown’s lawyer, Mark Geragos, asking for access to confidential LAPD personnel records to find out who leaked the photograph. The judge explained that although the leak of the photo wasn’t the best thing, it has no bearing on the case.

In related news, Rihanna just bought an umpire’s mask and a BeDazzler to prepare for her court appearance on June 22. Because if she has to protect her face from Chris’ fists, she’s going to do it in style!

Source: theblemish.com

Rihanna was spotted at Lucky Strike Lanes & Lounge on Monday making out with “Canadian former child actor-turned-rapper Aubrey “Drake” Graham.” A source provides more details.

“She was drinking whiskey and apple juice and making out with him all night,” says a spy. “They were really cute together.” Rihanna, who’s also been spending time in town with Katy Perry, peeled off with Drake at about midnight.

Who is this Drake fellow? That guy in the header pic? Nope. Still doesn’t ring a bell. Tell me more about this whiskey and apple juice thing though. Is it as disgusting as it sounds? I know there’s cranvodka, screwdrivers and white Russians, but mixing any alcohol with apple juice just sounds wrong. By contaminating my favorite childhood drink with whiskey, you’ve just raped it of its innocence. I hope you’re happy.

Source: theblemish.com

Just in case you couldn’t have figured it out when Brown repeatedly punched her in the face, Rihanna’s new single, Silly Boy, with Kanye West and someone assumed to be Lady GaGa but who might not be, hints that her relationship with Chris Brown may be over. A sampling of lyrics include:

I said I’m not coming back, it’s it
You fooled me once but you cant have that ego turning
Just to bad for you, that when you had me
Didn’t know what to do, she’s over you

You comin’ with those corny lines
Can’t live without me
I’ll get some flowers for the day that you are buried
No, people make mistakes
But I just think your ass is fake
Only thing I want from you, is for you to stay away

Hm, okay. But how does Rihanna really feel? Does she want him back or not? She needs to clarify. It’s really confusing with lyrics like “I’ll get some flowers for the day that you are buried.” If she hates him so much, why is she getting him flowers? Weird. I can never understand why women say I’m bad at taking hints. Have they ever realized that maybe it is they who are bad at giving hints.

Source: theblemish.com

Miss Info, who’s either a sassy gossip slinging mistress or a fat dude in his basement pretending to be a sassy gossip slinging mistress, claims that the recent leaked photos of both Rihanna and Cassie are not new. Rumor is that they’ve been shopped around for a year or so and that there are many more photos of not just Rihanna, Chris Brown and Cassie but of other celebs such as Jennifer Lopez, Jamie Foxx and Christina Millian.

All of those are expected to leak too. Which should be interesting. I’ve always wanted to see what Jamie Fo Jennifer Lopez looked like naked in her prime. I bet she needed a makeshift pulley system to keep her ass upright on that skinny frame.

Source: theblemish.com

This week just got tons more interesting. Earlier, Cassie Ventura’s topless photos were leaked by some “hacker”. Now someone leaked Rihanna’s nude photos to take the spotlight from Cassie. They’re ten times better too because there’s eight of them in alright detail including one of Chris Brown (no homo). In this war, there are no real losers. Just winners. Pics here and are very NSFW (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8) Something to note: Rihanna has pierced nipples too.

The only way to ruin my day now is to send me nude pics of Carrot Top.

Source: theblemish.com

For her first major appearance since Chris Brown beat her, Rihanna showed up at the Costume Institute Gala last night. At least that’s what I’m told. It seems a dapper young man took her place on the red carpet instead. Everyone must have been real confused as to why Rihanna sent her limo driver. Maybe Rihanna snuck in through the back?

Source: theblemish.com

Those puppy dog eyes aren’t going to get you out of this one, buddy

That leaked photograph of Rihanna may be used to get Chris Brown off. Ha! Like it hasn’t already. Brown’s attorney, Mark Geragos, will argue that the case should be dismissed because the leak demonstrates “outrageous governmental misconduct.” Meanwhile, a bloodstained Gucci gown was taken into police custody as evidence.

Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Patricia Schnegg today set a preliminary hearing for May 28 on Brown’s double felony case—the result of Geragos pushing for as late a court date as possible to allow him adequate time to respond to the still-pending investigation into just how Rihanna’s police photo was released.

Should the gruesome photos’ appearance prove to be the result of a police transgression, Geragos told E! News that he will move to have Brown’s entire case dismissed.

There’s overwhelming evidence that Chris Brown beat Rihanna. Yet, the biggest piece of evidence may be used to dismiss the case just because everyone has seen it. Makes sense. It’s like that time I set a homeless guy on fire and the news stations broadcast the crime scene photos. Case dismissed!

Source: theblemish.com

Beatrice Arthur dead at 86: The only Golden Girl you wanted to have sex with… wait, let me start over. Bea Arthur of The Golden Girls died on Saturday at the age of 86. R.I.P.

Desmond loves to motorboat: Henry Ian Cusick, Desmond on Lost, is being sued for sexual harassment by one Chelsea Stone. The suit alleges that while working on the show, Cusick grabbed her ass and made moaning sounds. In addition, he “placed his face on top of [her] breasts, moving his face from side to side.” Missing from this description is the sound he made: “Bwrrrrrrwrwr.” In her defense, it doesn’t translate too well into the written word.

Rihanna wants her jewelery back: Rihanna wants the $1.4 million worth of earrings and rings cops took from her on the night of her beating back. Sorry to break it to you, Officer Hardwick. You can’t play dress up and pretend you’re going to a fancy ball anymore.

Source: theblemish.com

Rumors of Chris Brown and Rihanna still being together are swirling around. They say that even when Rihanna was house shopping she was sending detailed photos back to Chris for his approval. Now the Daily Star is saying they may even make an appearance together at an event honoring a songwriter that’s worked with them both.

Andre Merritt, who penned Rihanna’s Disturbia and Brown’s Forever, is to be feted at an ASCAP Awards after-show party in Hollywood on 22 April (09) – and both former lovers plan on being there to toast him.

If the exes do show up for the Hwood club event, it will be the first time they’ve been out in public since a late-night fight on 8 February (09) landed Brown in legal trouble and Rihanna in the hospital.

Rihanna better prepare herself. She should wear an umpire mask and come dressed in bubble wrap. It’ll be both functional and fashionable.