Source: theblemish.com

Mariah Carey is rich, famous and now 15 pounds heavier because she’s been stuffing her face for who knows how long.

“Mariah loves food. Right now she’s making an album and eating everything and anything she wants. She has put on about 15 pounds, but she loves the curves,” said our source. Our tipster adds, “She’ll definitely tone up again when she releases her album, but as of now, she’s stuffing her face.”

At least, everyone hopes so. No one wants another Kelly Clarkson on their hands. Try getting that girl on stage without a snack first. I’m surprised the fat hasn’t pressed up against her vocal cords by now and changed her voice completely.

Source: theblemish.com

Mariah Carey, whose diva behavior has been well documented, threw a fit when the director for her upcoming flick Precious, Lee Daniels, pulled a diva move on her. Daniels showed up almost an hour late at the premiere of his film at the Cannes Film Festival last Friday. Mariah was said to be bitter because Mariah is a big star and all Lee Daniels does is tell actors where to stand and how to say their lines. What an ass.

“Can you imagine Mariah Carey waiting for anyone?” wondered our incredulous source, adding, “Both Mariah and (co-star) Lenny Kravitz were pissed off. They thought it was disrespectful.”

When we reached out to Daniels for comment, he seemed a bit puzzled by any animosity on Carey’s part. “I was not late,” he insisted. “I believe you have been misinformed.” He hastened to add, “I had the best time of my life though.”

Translation: He was plastered. Which is really the only way to deal with someone like Mariah Carey. Hell if anyone is going to listen to Mimi drone on about her Hello Kitty collection and her “talented” husband Nick Cannon sober. Yea, that Nick Cannon over there that’s stuffing a tray of pigs in a blanket into his pockets.

Source: theblemish.com

Some would try to hurt Nick Cannon by pointing out with this picture that he made a very poor decision when he married this thing that Eminem peed on, but I’m sure he’ll be able to find some comfort in the pool of gold coins he swims in everyday.

[Mariah Carey without her face paint in the upcoming film "Precious"]

Source: theblemish.com

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon celebrated their one year anniversary last night. Mariah was so happy she cried. Nick cried too, but for different reasons. Every time he tries to kill her, she escapes. She’s like the Road Runner and he’s Wile E. Coyote. Next time you see them he’s going to attach a big ACME rocket to her head only to have it fall off and land in his pants.

Source: theblemish.com

Mariah Carey may have been given the honor to perform for the president of the United States at the Neighborhood Ball, but that didn’t stop her from whining.

Mariah was “furious” at the seating arrangements. She thought she would be sitting right next to the Obamas. Turns out she had to sit with the other losers in the VIP area.

“Mariah was in the VIP area, where every celebrity, like Jon Bon Jovi, Mary J. Blige, Alicia Keys and Bruce Springsteen, was seated. But somehow she thought she’d be up with the Obama family. When she realized she wasn’t, she bailed.”

I hope Obama’s staff knows what they’ve done. Hell hath no fury like a Mariah Carey scorned. She’s likely to unleash her unholy Hello Kitty army on them. Wait until they’re mercilessly beaten by thousands of fictional Japanese cats. Then maybe next time they’ll think twice about not sitting her next to the Obamas.

Source: theblemish.com

Jay-Z, Beyonce, Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon all partied together on NYE. As they should have since they’re all desperate attention whores. Here they are at said celebration. As you can see, Jay-Z is wondering why his wife and Mariah are blocking him out of the shot. Maybe it has to do with the fact that he’s ugly. Dressing like Steve Urkel didn’t help either.

Source: theblemish.com

Nick Cannon may have sunk his pubescent claws even deeper into Mariah Carey. Page Six reports today that she was seen in LA coming out of an ob/gyn’s office “clutching what looked like a sonogram and being greeted by her entourage with cheers. She was ebullient.” A rep said Mariah never tells him anything and then stomped out of the room. When Nick Cannon was asked about the pregnancy, his eyes turned into dollar signs and an audible “cha-ching” was heard. Hmm, odd.

Source: theblemish.com

Because she is pure and virginal, Mariah Carey made Nick Cannon wait two months until after they were married to have sex. Seeing as how Mariah has a gajillion dollars, Nick obliged.

“I definitely don’t want to push it on anybody else. But we both have similar beliefs, and I just thought that it would be so much more special if we waited until after we were married. And it was, and it still is.”

Nick probably had some on the side anyway. If he didn’t, I suspect there was a sea of used Kleenex’s on the ground around his computer that Mariah had to wade through every time she came over. His hard drive was probably full of folders named “naked chicks,” “naked chicks blowing dudes” and “japanese tentacle rape”.

Source: theblemish.com

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon hosted a Halloween costume party yesterday where she had not one, but two costumes. Her first was a slutty cookie adorned with edible cookies. Nick was a carton of milk. Then when Mariah ate her costume, she dressed as a slutty fireman while Nick dressed as a regular fireman.

I expect better from these two. Like a Snoopy costume made out of a real dog or at least something equally as unacceptable in normal society. Sheesh, I thought rich people were cooler than this.

Source: theblemish.com

According to the National Enquirer via MNSBC, the recently wed Nick Cannon has been having the time of his life with his newfound wealth courtesy of Mariah Carey. Most recently, Nick was seen test-driving a $120,000 Maserati Quattroporte. A vehicle he may add to his armada. Nick currently owns a Rolls-Royce Phantom and a Cadillac Escalade along with four other luxury cars.

“Nick’s having a field day with Mariah’s moolah!” a friend of the diva told the Enquirer. “His head is spinning with the possibilities her black Amex card affords. For now, Mariah is being indulgent with his spending spree, but at the same time, it’s sent up a red flag.”

Another Mariah pal points to Nick’s wedding bling, a heavily bejeweled band, as the sort of thing he expects Mariah to provide. “It’s garish and tacky – and yet another example of Nick’s extravagance at Mariah’s expense,” the source told the magazine. “It’s as if Nick is trying to spend as much as he can as fast as he can – because deep down he knows the gravy train could stop at any time.”

Nick will probably deny these claims saying it’s merely a coincidence. He was about to buy another $120,000 car anyway as we are all apt to do. In fact, if you want to know what’s really going on, just ask Nick himself. You can find him next door swimming in his vault of gold coins or on his golden bidet, drying his ass with $100 bills.

[Newlyweds Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon after his DJ gig in NYC for Operation Smile, Image via Splash News]