Source: theblemish.com

Sometimes I get the feeling Michael Lohan doesn’t approve of Lindsay’s girlfriend Samantha Ronson. Case in point. Michael Lohan’s scathing e-mail to X17online where he calls Samantha “dark, hideous and a disgusting representation of humanity.”

“I don’t believe that the recent blogs posted by ‘Lindsay’ were written by her” and touted, “There is a lot more to Samantha than meets the eye. Not that what we see is so pleasing anyway . . . what’s with this ‘person?’ Look at the way she ‘dresses.’

“Once more, she uses her middle finger more than she uses words. Have you ever seen her apartment? For God’s sake, when she runs out of toilet paper she tells people to use the cardboard roll. (I was told this firsthand).”

Hey, when you’re out of TP you gotta do what you gotta do and if that means using a towel and rinsing it off in the tub, then so be it. Just don’t mention it at dinner. People are kind of uptight about it. Anyway, Lindsay responded to Michael’s letter.

“My father obviously needs to be on medication to control his moods. He is out of line and his words show how much anger he has, and it’s dangerous and scary as it reminds me of how he treated my mother and I my whole childhood. He needs to be stopped. This is yet another reason why we aren’t speaking.

“I am in a great place in life,” Lindsay continued. “I have overcome a lot and have been able to learn how to enjoy and appreciate my life in every way possible. I’m proud of myself for being able to make a change in the past year and a half.

“My past is behind me, and that’s final. There’s nothing more to be said. All the false accusations that people try to make are simply because there’s no story when things are calm and good.

“But they might as well let it go because their lies don’t affect me anymore. Samantha is not evil, I care for her very much and she’s a wonderful girl.

“She loves me, as I do her.”

Argh, so many words to read. A much better, more concise response would have been “Fuck you, dad. I’m going gay.”

Source: theblemish.com

Yesterday on Loveline, Samantha Ronson called in to talk about Travis Barker and DJ AM’s plane crash. Near the end of the conversation, Sam handed the phone to Lindsay and Stryker asked, “Now you guys, you and Samantha have been going out for how long now? Like two years? One year? Five months? Two months?” Lindsay laughs and says, “A very long time.” Whatever. I still don’t consider Lindsay a lesbian. Samantha Ronson is the furthest thing you could get from a girl. You could put a wig on a mop and it’d be more feminine than her.

Update: Clip via Dlisted below

Source: theblemish.com

Samantha Ronson announced to party-goers at the Chateau Marmont club in LA that “by the end of this year, my love will be Mrs. Ronson” and “tonight shows the power of a woman – to underestimate that is to underestimate the world.” The news suggests that Sam and LIndsay Lohan are planning to marry at the end of the year.

Lending more credence to the sapphic relationship is the interview Lindsay gave to Marie Claire. “Samantha had some stars so I had some done as well. I am very happy. She is a fantastic person who has a great influence on everyone around her.”

Whatever. Lindsay will be over Samantha by this time next year. Lindsay never went to college to experiment with girls so she needs to get this out of her system. She’s kind of taking this too far though. Her vagina is probably screaming at her for penis. Every night it yells, “For the love of god, feed me!,” and every time Lindsay, startled, looks around to see who said that.

Source: theblemish.com

Yesterday, Michael Lohan, suspicious about Lindsay’s drinking habits, issued a statement to the press to show his concern and basically called Samantha Ronson a bad influence. Michael also accused Sam of using Lindsay for her fame and says that she even has a book coming out.

Lindsay issued her own statement yesterday calling Michael an attention whore and asking him to “stop hurting and talking to the media about the people I love.”

Sam has also gotten in on the action, but since she’s not famous enough, she went to her MySpace instead of the press.

SHUT THE F*** UP
Current mood: bullied

i really don’t want to say anything because i feel like he wins- he, being the man who is so desperate for attention that he goes to the media whenever possible- i know i am being used, i am just a pawn- easy to sacrifice in order to feed his addiction. I was angry when i first read his attack on me, but- for me- i believe that actions speak louder than words… so now i just pity him- i am not standing in his way- i am not the reason that he has no contact with his daughter- he is- his need to throw a tantrum for the whole world to hear is- i am not going to go into a play by play defense- i feel no need to publicly defend my role in lindsay’s life- i’m just sorry that she likes me more than him.

p.s. i’m not the one that is so lost that i need to use my relationship with lindsay to earn a living…. i am, always will and always have been here for her for her- not for anything else….so I think it’s safe to say that there is not now and never will be a tell all….. written by me….. when does your book come out mr. lohan?

Alright, so no book? What a shame. I was really interested in reading stuff like, Day 1: I met Lindsay. We got drunk. High. Day 2: Lindsay again. Drunk. High. Day 3: Finally managed to get Lindsay drunk/high enough to have sex with me. Plan is coming to fruition. Day 4: Lindsay is now a lesbian. Too easy. Day 5: Drunk. High. And so on and so on.

Source: theblemish.com

Samantha Ronson wasn’t Lindsay Lohan’s first female lover a source tells News of the World. Months before Ronson, Lindsay was with Courtenay Semel and even shared a place together (some evidence to their relationship here). At the time, Lindsay was confused about her sexuality and never went public as she did with Samantha for fear of ruining her career. Allegedly, when Lindsay was with Semel, she would bang a lot of dudes and snort a lot of coke in an attempt to “suppress her urges”.

“But eventually she just gave in and at every party they’d kiss and touch each other in the corner. It’s a miracle nobody found out.

“Both of them would do lines of cocaine in the toilets then head home and fall into bed together.”

Lindsay’s relationship with both Semel and Ronson devolved into a warped love triangle before Semel, tired of the men Lindsay kept bringing home, moved out and Ronson became her true love.

Hollywood seems fun. The only love triangle I ever had was a heart I drew on a valentine that sort of looked like a triangle. It didn’t lead to bi-sexuality and coke fueled orgies though. It was more stifled laughter which turned into frenzied pointing and ear shattering guffaws. I wish I could just forget yesterday.

Source: theblemish.com

OK! Magazine calls Lindsay Lohan a Faux-mosexual in their thrilling piece about Lindsay’s latest flip-flop in her sexuality (I prefer fun-sexual). Friends tell OK! that while her relationship with Samantha is suffering, she’s been flirting, laughing and giggling with guys. A clear indication that she craves the cock that was once part of her food pyramid.

“Lindsay is the aggressive one in the relationship,” an insider tells OK!. “Sam tries to focus on Lindsay, but it’s never enough.” Another friend adds, “Lindsay has to be the center of attention, or she’ll flirt with other guys to make Sam jealous.”

It’s not surprising that this lasted as long as it did. Samantha kind of looks like a boy. Still, one can only pretend for for so long. I’m sure fisting was great and all, sort of like sticking your hand into a pit of despair, but it just didn’t feel the same to Lindsay.

Source: theblemish.com

Lindsay Lohan has big tits and for some reason she’s dating Samantha Ronson. Allegedly. Still, it might as well be true. There has been no evidence to the contrary while there has been a lot of innuendo confirming it. Anyway, according to News of the World, they’re so in love that they want to get married. Probably around the time when Lindsay’s new album drops. It’s a mystery why they would do that.

Lindsay’s mum Dina has told pals that she wants to “welcome Sam into the family” with a lavish do, including drinks and canapes for Li-Lo’s pals and relatives.

The 22-year-old Freaky Friday star has been shopping for a white mini-dress for the occasion —and I hear she’s chosen a very bridal-looking one by Chanel.

Whatever. There’s no way Samantha or “Sam” can handle a little firecracker like Lindsay. The only person capable of taming this cock hungry lion is me and my spiked dog collar. So don’t be surprised when you hear news of Lindsay cheating on Sam with a devilishly handsome bachelor with granite abs and a medicine cabinet full of tranqs because it’s bound to happen. The eligible bachelor is me by the way. I’m not sure if you got that.

Source: theblemish.com

If this thing blew a kiss at me, I’d think it was casting a spell on me and I’d have to stab it or at the very least, paw wildly at the air in an effort to keep the air kiss from ever reaching my soft, supple lips.

Source: theblemish.com

Is Lindsay Lohan in a relationship with Samantha Ronson? People ask themselves this very question in between bites of their morning bagel. According to PEOPLE magazine, she is because their article on Lindsay Lohan’s prom-themed 22nd birthday party places a lot of emphasis on the PDA between Ronson and Lohan throughout the night. For example:

Once the 50 guests – including former Sopranos star Jamie Lynn Sigler and Lohan’s younger brother Michael – began arriving at the balloon-filled venue, the Birthday Girl greeted them all energetically with smiles, hugs and kisses. Ronson was never far behind, often keeping her hand on the small of Lohan’s back.

And,

As the party wound down, the couple appeared to relax, even sneaking in a small peck on the lips at the DJ booth. By 1:15 a.m., the music was muted and Lohan turned out the lights with Ronson by her side.

I don’t know about this whole lesbian thing, but I have to admit, Samantha Ronson does look quite dapper. Like a young Luke Skywalker. Who wouldn’t want to date this sexy Jedi? Rawr.

Judging by this guy’s expression, Lindsay wasn’t wearing underwear.

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Even though Lindsay Lohan’s mother and sister deny that she is romantically involved with Samantha Ronson, Lindsay’s blabbermouth father, Michael, has no problems outing his famous daughter.

Michael spoke with Usmagazine.com about the lesbian relationship between Lindsay and Sam. He says, “it’s evident to anyone with half a brain.”

Even though he was so eager to publicly announce his daughter’s sexuality, he says that it’s something he really doesn’t want to know about. “Just like the Marilyn Monroe spread, Linds is my daughter and there are just some things a father doesn’t want to see or hear, regardless of whether they are true or false.”

Michael also used the opportunity to slam Lindsay’s mother, Dina, saying she exploits her children and that the family has basically gone to hell since their split. He says, “Maybe her mother’s life revolves around the tabloids and reports, but mine doesn’t. I am into setting a good example and doing good things that don’t deceive or exploit my kids. But I will say this: While we were a family, you never even saw or heard a negative thing about any of us. But since the separation, look at everything that has happened!”

So, did I hear that right? He’s not into exploiting his children, but yet he continually runs to tabloids to spill the family’s personal business. Dina and Michael are both equally nuts! And as you know, crazy + crazy = Lindsay Lohan!

Yes, the relationship is obvious, but for Michael to out his daughter just goes to show you how classless this family is.