Source: theblemish.com

A couple more pictures of Paris Hilton eating the floor have popped up. You can tell how much Benji Madden cares for her as he attempts to boot her in the face until he realizes the paparazzi are around. He decided against it and instead, he dragged her lifeless carcass outside. What a gentleman.

A bunch of people are hoping there’s video of this, but so far, nothing. Although, the real travesty here isn’t the lack of footage, it’s that Paris’ face didn’t reach terminal velocity before hitting the ground. Screw you physics!

Source: theblemish.com

Paparazzi were chasing Paris and her boyfriend Benji Madden in Berlin over the weekend and as the two were running away, Paris tripped and fell face first into the hard, unforgiving concrete. Haha, retard. Sadly, no one managed to snap pictures or take video. There was only the before and after. Nevertheless, it was a momentous occasion for both of us. For me, it marked the 100th time I laughed my ass off at Paris’ shortcomings. I celebrated by punching out a cardboard cutout of her. For Paris, it marked the first time her chin smacked against something other than balls. I believe kudos are in order.

Video of Benji crying about it below.

Source: seriouslyomg.com

What is the point of all those paparazzis following her in Prague if they didn’t get the money shot of her falling on her face? Seriously when did Paris Hilton get so camera shy?

Source: evilbeetgossip.com

A million thanks to the Czech Republic, where Paris Hilton visited while tagging along with Benji Madden on the Good Charlotte tour.

Paris was sporting this scrape on her chin, after she supposedly fell while being swarmed with paparazzi after a show at the Congress Centre.

Whatever. I think one of the roadies finally had the balls to hit her with an upper-cut.

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Paris Hilton normally loves attention from paparazzi, but recently she fell down as she tried to outrun them and ended up cutting her precious little face.

Unfortunately, we don’t get to see the fall itself or the injury, but here it is anyway.

Source: evilbeetgossip.com

Here’s 10 minutes of your life you’re never going to get back. It’s Paris Hilton judging the Miss Turkey pageant.

Around 5:30 she attempts to belly dance. It’s one of the more awkward things I’ve come across this year. It’s like even Paris is like, “Dude, I am in no way qualified to do this. Please. Make it stop.” I mean, I don’t know much about the art of belly dancing, but I’m pretty sure this is a huge affront to it.

Like if America’s Next Top Model traveled to Turkey and they taught the girls to belly dance, and one of the girls did this shit on stage, the end result would undoubtedly be a lengthy lecture by the local expert on how she’s essentially urinated all over the Turkish culture and, were she not here with a CW production crew, would now do jail time.

Source: theblemish.com

Paris Hilton made her way to Istanbul, Turkey to judge the annual Miss Turkey beauty pageant. Which is like asking a deaf person to judge a singing contest. While there, she responded to being portrayed as a superficial retard who built her fame off the Hilton family name and a poorly thought out porn tape. Apparently, this is not true.

“I don’t pay attention to lies because I am a good person,” says the hotel heiress. “I work very hard and I’ve built this empire on my own. I think this is an inspiration for a lot of girls out there.”

I can hear it now. A few thousand vapid wannabes just asked their boyfriends to film them having sex and leak it on the web. I take it back, Paris. You are an inspiration. Not to women, but to men to show them the ease of which some girls can be tricked. Mini DV tapes, here I come.

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Paris Hilton continued to infect the world in Turkey where she attended and judged the Miss Turkey 2008 contest in Istanbul.

Paris was led onstage by a belly dancer who invited Paris to dance with her. The only problem is that Paris can’t dance - let alone belly dance.

Paris strutted around the stage with that dumb look on her face that just screams, “I’m so hot.”

When the dancer tried to show her some moves Paris was completely off beat and just continued on with her sultry ‘come-f*ck-me’ dance.

The only decent thing I can say is that the skank had a nice dress.

Source

Source: evilbeetgossip.com

I am sincerely proud to live in a society where there is no longer any such thing as fifteen minutes of fame.

In today’s media culture, once you’re awarded the fifteen minutes, you can have as many more as you want, and I think that’s fantastic. It makes everything so much more interesting.

Here’s Paris Hilton’s former boy-toy, Pizza Boy Alex Vaggo, leaving S Bar in Hollywood with an unidentified blonde hottie. Can anyone ID this girl? She looks familiar, but I can’t place her. Maybe she just looks like every other girl on the Strip, I dunno. But she’s cute and I like the way she dresses. I should make her famous. Bloggers can do that now, right? (Did everyone catch the MSNBC clip where Perez Hilton takes 100% of the credit for launching Amy Winehouse’s career? Yeah. This girl is my Amy Winehouse. Let’s find out who she is and I will personally see to it that she wins five Grammys next year. Someone have her call me.)

Why are the photo agencies still snapping pictures of this guy? He’s, like, 18 boyfriends ago for Paris.

I don’t know! But I LOVE it!

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

“I love Africa in general - South Africa and West Africa, they are both great countries.”

- Paris Hilton not realizing she sucks at geography.

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