Source: theblemish.com

Here’s Miley Cyrus making out with Liam Hemsworth in the ocean. Actually, it’s a scene from a movie she’s filming called The Last Song.

Aw, this brings back memories of me kissing my first boy in the ocean… er, wait. I meant, I remember when I made out with a really hot chick on the beach and then did her. Doggy style. High five! Anyone?

Source: theblemish.com

Miley Cyrus updated her Twitter yesterday with a picture of her and her mother at dinner in Savannah. Looks like Miley is finally hitting the awkward teen years because she pierced her nose (click the header for the enlarged version). There’s some debate as to whether it’s fake or real. I’m not sure either way because I haven’t seen a nose piercing like that since the 90’s. It’s pretty cliche as far as rebellious teenage statements go. It follows that she’ll probably be dating black guys next.

Source: theblemish.com

Good news for Justin Gaston. He’ll no longer have to worry about being prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law because, despite the fact he has a shirt woven by God, Miley Cyrus broke up with him.

“They have been having trouble for a while,” says the insider. “It’s been hard for a long time since Miley has been working so much and traveling a lot.”

Ha! Good luck trying to get Johnny Depp to play you in a movie now that Miley isn’t on board. And good luck trying to trick another 15-year-old into liking you. Kids are a lot smarter these days and a white van combined with a bag of candy from the Sweet Factory won’t cut it anymore.

Source: theblemish.com

If you’re the type of person who’s really into Miley Cyrus bikini pictures, then here you go. Enjoy it while you can because I’ve traced your IP and helped you register under the terms of Megan’s Law. I see you’re speechless. It’s okay, man. Your gratitude is all the thanks I need.

Source: theblemish.com

Miley Cyrus and that gay Jonas brother, no the other one, Nick Jonas, have gotten back together. Friends say Nick is insisting Miley break it off with current boyfriend Justin Gaston so they can make-out in Nick’s room while his parents watch without feeling guilty.

“Miley and Nick want to get back together,” our source tells us. “Because they’re working together [on a new video], they’ve been put in close proximity to each other. They’re now spending more and more time together, and they’re constantly on the phone.”

But do friends kiss and cuddle? When the two get together these days, their relationship hardly seems platonic. Says our insider, “Miley was over at the Jonas house recently, and they were smooching. Nick’s parents have this rule that when a girl is over, the door has to be open, but that didn’t stop Nick and Miley from making out.”

Nick Jonas is the gayest dude ever. Justin has probably banged Miley six ways till Sunday, but Nick probably wears latex gloves just to touch her boobs. He probably even asks permission first. And not even to touch real boob. To touch boob that’s under a shirt and bra. If you showed Nick a picture of a vagina, he’d probably start crying and cursing god.

Source: theblemish.com

Jamie Foxx apologized on Tuesday for comments he made on his Sirius radio show where he said Miley Cyrus needed a gum transplant, make a sex tape and catch chlamydia from a bicycle seat. He’ll be disappointed to know Miley’s dad, Billy Ray, does not accept his apology.

Billy Ray showed up on The Bonnie Hunt show and said Foxx’s quips were “hurtful. There wasn’t nothing funny about it. And, quite frankly, I think if I said those things about his daughter, he might not find it so comedic.” Then he did a little jig and went “yuck, yuck, yuck” like a yokel. Afterward, he said, “Make fun of my daughter/sister again and I will end you.” Following that, he went “yipeee kiyaaa” while shooting pistols into the air.

This scene was recreated based off of stereotypes of course because I didn’t actually watch the episode. Does that stereotype even apply? Where is Billy Ray from anyway. I probably should have researched this a little more.

Source: theblemish.com

Jamie Foxx was a guest on Jay Leno last night promoting his upcoming film The Soloist where he publicly apologized for telling Miley to get a gum transplant, make a sex tape with her dad, smoke crack, shoot heroin and catch chlamydia from a bicycle seat on his Sirius radio show. Jamie, calling his show the black Howard Stern, says that because he’s a comedian first and foremost, he sometimes gets carried away.

“I so apologize to [Miley], and this is sincere. I am a comedian, and you guys know that whatever I say, I don’t mean any of it. And sometimes, as comedians, as we do, we go a little bit too far. I have a radio show. We’re really the black Howard Stern. We go at everybody. There was a situation with Miley Cyrus, and I just want to say, I apologize for what I said. I didn’t mean it maliciously. You know I’m a comedian. You know my heart.”

Jamie was probably scared that the Miley Cyrus army was getting ready to mobilize and he didn’t want any of that. One more day and they would have kicked his ass. Being beat up by a bunch of 12-year-old girls and then tied naked to a flag pole with a Hannah Montanna themed rope wearing only your Pound Puppies boxers would have been pretty embarrassing. For Jamie, I mean. For me, that’s called a Thursday.

Source: theblemish.com

Jamie Foxx has a Sirius show called The Foxxhole which sounds really gay, but anyway. Over the weekend, he and his cohorts talked about Miley swearing to ruin Radiohead’s career after they refused to meet her before their performance at the Grammy’s.

To put it mildly, Foxx thought Miley was a little unreasonable and went off on her with insults like: Miley needs to “get a gum transplant,” “make a sex tape with your daddy,” do heroin like Britney spears, do crack like Lindsay Lohan and catch chlamydia from a bicycle seat.

Don’t worry though kids. Miley is going to hee-haw this off. Like water off a gummy bicycle rider’s back. That’s all she can do anyway. Miley thinks black people are scary.

Source: theblemish.com

Miley Cyrus says that since meeting her 20-year-old boyfriend, she’s become closer to the Lord.

“I’ve never been closer to the Lord since I met him,” she says on The Rachael Ray Show in an interview airing Friday. “He’s really made me read my Bible. He’s made me actually read the stories in the Bible — not the quick little verses — that not only help me, but show you how to help other people.”

There you go Mr. Billy Ray Cyrus and Disney. Miley is definitely not having sex with Justin when she’s behind closed doors. She’s actually being made to read Bible stories. Mostly she reads Justin’s favorite passage about the sodomites. He loves to do re-enactments.

Source: theblemish.com

Back at the Grammys, Miley Cyrus wanted to meet her most favorite band in the whole wide world, Radiohead, and told her managers to do everything they could to make it happen. To appease her, they asked Radiohead only to be told “we don’t do really do that.” Miley was heartbroken because “this is someone I would cry over.” She ended up not watching them perform at the Grammys and said: “I’m gonna ruin them, I’m going to tell everyone.” And she did. She told everyone about this on a radio show. To add some perspective, Radiohead released “Creep” in 1992 at around the time Miley Cyrus was born. Suffice to say, Miley’s threat had them shaking in their boots. Or maybe not.

Radiohead, in their infinite wisdom, released this statement to Us Weekly: “When Miley grows up, she’ll learn not to have such a sense of entitlement.” Owned!

Miley probably thinks the world revolves around her and that Radiohead, despite never doing meet and greets before, would submit to her whimsy. I’m glad someone put her in her place. That uppity bitch’s head is getting too big for her shoulders. Literally. I think it’s genetic.

What makes Radiohead even more awesome is they also snubbed Kanye West at the Grammys. He didn’t go as far as to be a whiny brat and refuse to see them perform, but Kanye said “I sat the fuck down.” He showed those jerks!