Matthew McConaughey’s mom is awesome

Matthew McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey’s mom, Kay, released I Amaze Myself!, a book detailing everything about her life. Kay is ashamed of nothing, even writing about how Matt’s dad died while in mid-coitus.

“On Monday mornings, he and I often said goodbye by making love,” Kay says exclusively in the latest issue of Us Weekly. “But one day, all of a sudden, it just happened.

“I knew that something was wrong, because I didn’t hear anything from him. Just nothing,” she says. “But it was just the best way to go!”

And when her man couldn’t be revived, she made sure he was taken from the house in the buff.

“I was just so proud to show off my big old Jim McConaughey — and his gift,” she says.

It would be cool if he had a huge boner when EMTs carried him out and all the neighbors stood around watching this horrible scene unfold with their kids and their kids said, “Mommy, mommy. Why does Mr. McConaughey have a third leg and why is it pointed up?” The parents would have to make up a bs excuse like, “It’s pointing to Heaven so his soul knows where to go.” All the while they’re fanning themselves because they’re getting all hot.

Published on August 27th, 2008 in Kay Mcconaughey, Matthew McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey wants to plant his placenta

Source: theblemish.com

Matthew McConaughey saved the placenta from the birth of his son and plans to plant it in an orchard. In an interview with CNN’s “House Call with Dr. Sanjay Gupta,” McConaughey details his dream of growing wonderful placentas.

“It’s going to be in the orchards and it’s going to bear some wonderful fruit,” he says, according to an interview transcript. “When I was in Australia, they had a placenta tree that was on the river … and all the placentas of all that tribe, all that clan, whatever aboriginal tribe that was, all the placentas went under that one tree and it was this huge behemoth of just health and strength.

Great. I was a little hungry before, but now I’m starving. It’s like my mom always said. Every day begins with a well balanced meal. That’s why each morning as I kid I enjoyed a fresh plate of bacon, eggs and placenta. Mmm, the breakfast of champions.

Published on August 11th, 2008 in Matthew McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey reveals Levi

Source: theblemish.com

Matthew, Camila and Levi

OK! Magazine has managed to finally corner the entire celebrity baby market. Their latest conquest is Matthew McConaughey’s son, Levi Alves McConaughey.

“We found a great rhythm,” Matthew tells OK! about the delivery of baby Levi. “Contractions started kicking in. I sat there with her, right between her legs. We got tribal on it, we danced to it! I was DJ-ing this Brazilian music.”

“I have it all chronicled,” he explained. “Becoming a dad is something I’ve dreamed of doing since I was 10. Becoming a father felt very, very natural. We were jamming! She was sweating. No painkiller, let’s go. She just clicked into that gear that only a woman has at a time like this. We’d been up for 40-something hours, and we went from dead tired to a really steadfast, ‘Let’s handle this… let’s stay in the rhythm. Don’t let the contraction be more than you.’”

Ten mystery points to anyone who can figure out what the hell Matthew is talking about. Going tribal? Dancing? Brazilian music? What the the hell was this? A rave? That must have been distracting for the doctors. Having Matthew shove glow sticks in their mouths while they tried to get the baby out.

Published on July 23rd, 2008 in Camila Alves, Matthew McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey and Camila Alves have a boy

Source: theblemish.com

Matthew McConaughey and Camila Alves

Matthew McConaughey’s girlfirend, Camila Alves, gave birth to a 7 lbs. 4 oz. future beach bum on Monday night. No name has been given, so here are some surfer suggestions. Hang Ten, Brohym, Gnarly, Rip Curl or Chad. Matt’s brother, Rooster (!!), expressed his enthusiasm, “Oh, it’s going to be fun! He’ll make a really good dad because he’s got a lot of patience. I’m excited for him. It’s about time.”

Here’s to Matt and Camila’s little boy. Surfing in the tub in 6 months, perennially shirtless in 8 years, banging models by 16, coked out of his mind, naked and playing the bongos at his friend’s house by 20.

[Matthew McConaughey and pregnant girlfriend Camila Alves attend the W Magazine party for Stewart Townsend's directorial debut. Image via Splash News]

Published on July 8th, 2008 in Camila Alves, Matthew McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey is protected

Source: theblemish.com

Paparazzi were at the beach trying to capture footage of Matthew McConaughey surfing when locals became agitated and started a fight. TMZ says:

After a beachgoer chucked a beer bottle at one of the paps on the shore, an all-out brawl took place by the water — ending with some badly busted-up faces and a lot of ruined camera equipment.

In the video you can hear the surfer telling the paparazzi to get a real job. The pap said he has a real job and asked him what he does. To which the surfer replied, “I drink beer and party.”

Surfers make no sense. They think they’re clever by saying this stuff, but they probably don’t know how stupid they sound. Next time you go to the beach and see a violent gang of surfers like this you should inform them of this fact. If all goes according to plan, they will thank you for pointing this out and maybe treat you to a beer or two for making them a better person.

Published on June 23rd, 2008 in Matthew McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey Gets His Party On

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Matt McC - Rock Out Before It Pops Out

Published on June 18th, 2008 in Drunk Celebrities, Matthew McConaughey, Party Time, Videos, drunks

Matthew McConaughey knows how to party

Source: theblemish.com

Matthew McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey and girlfriend Camila Alves are expecting their first child any day now. Naturally, this makes it the perfect time to head on over to Nicaragua, get drunk and grope and hit on girls. Star Magazine writes:

“He was acting like an out-of-control 18-year-old,” claims an eyewitness who was at the bar. “He already seemed to be drunk when he arrived alone, and he only got worse from there on. He was putting the make on every woman in his path, throwing his arms around them and trying to kiss them, and trying to dirty-dance with a few out on the floor. But he was a mess, slurring his words and stumbling around.

“A few minutes after he finally left the bar, someone found him searching through a sewage ditch outside. When they asked him what he was doing, he mumbled, ‘I’ve lost my flip-flops!’”

If it’s any comfort to Camila Alves, at least Matt wasn’t searching for a dead hooker in that sewage ditch. Amiright? Hey, why are you sobbing? What did I say?

Published on June 18th, 2008 in Matthew McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey’s Son to Be Named After Budweiser?

Source: www.celebritysmackblog.com

Will Matthew McConaughey name his son ‘Bud’ after his favorite beer?

That’s what new reports are saying.

McConaughey got the idea from his older brother, who named his son ‘Miller’.

A source told Star magazine, “Matthew’s older brother Michael named his second son Miller Lyte because he loved the beer so much. And Matthew loved the name so much he really wants to name his son after his favorite beer. He is thinking of going for Bud after Budweiser beer.”

Camila Alves isn’t too thrilled about the name. She thinks it’s a ridiculous idea.

The source added, “Camila is pretty old-fashioned. She hates the name and won’t let Matthew push her into this.”

It could be worse Camila. At least he isn’t into microbrews.

Heh.

Source

Published on March 10th, 2008 in Bizarre, Camila Alves, Celebrity Babies, Matthew McConaughey, WTF

Matthew McConaughey starts his own clothing line

Source: www.celebitchy.com

Though Matthew McConaughey is best known for shunning most forms of clothing – or at least that’s what he’s most photographed in – the soon-to-be dad is starting his own clothing line, j.k. livin, based on his famous life motto. It’ll be mostly beachwear and other laid-back clothing styles, which generally fit with Matthew’s persona. Don’t expect him to go all P. Diddy couture or anything.

Us Weekly has learned exclusively that the sand-and-surf-loving star, 38, is developing his own line of swim apparel named j.k. livin, after his production company — and personal mantra — “Just keep livin’.”

Available via his Web site, matthewmcconaughey.com, this summer, the must-haves will run the gamut from T-shirts to swimsuits to Frisbees.

“It will be a one-stop shop for every-thing you need for the beach,” a rep for the actor, who’s expecting another special delivery this summer (a baby with Brazilian model love Camila Alves, 25), tells Us.

(“There’s a perception of me as a beach guy,” the actor — in a j.k. livin shirt — has said.)

Not bad for a man who recently dished to dished to Playboy: “My mom didn’t even put a bathing suit on us at the country club until we were 9.”

[From Us Weekly]

I would hazard a guess that Matthew McConaughey spends approximately 9.3x more time naked than the average American. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. It’s just funny that someone best known for exposing his chest and six pack is selling things that will cover them up. Hopefully Matthew won’t start wearing too much clothing now, as that’d be a real shame. Matthew was recently voted as having the celebrity with the best chest, according to OK! magazine. Now if only he could somehow sell his chest online.

These pics are old, but they’re a really great example of McConaughey’s laid-back, beachy lifestyle. I swear that’s the only reason they’re here.