Source: theblemish.com

Before Marisa Miller was ever a Victoria’s Secret Angel, she modeled for Perfect 10. A lot of you have seen those shots of her on the tennis court (was it the tennis court?), but these aren’t those. These are something else entirely. You may want to hold on to your socks because they’re about to be knocked off.

More in the gallery.

Source: theblemish.com

If I was invited backstage to see this, my head would explode. I wouldn’t even be able to get a word out. The only thing you’d hear from me is a short, high pitched grunt before I started sobbing and stammering about how this is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. I mean, that fabric is just to die for!

Source: theblemish.com

For whatever reason, Marisa Miller hit up the Grammy Awards yesterday despite her lack of musical relevance. It’s safe to say people didn’t ask questions. Marisa Miller could show up to a funeral to do an impromptu photo shoot and the closest thing to an objection would be someone asking why her tits are still covered.

Source: theblemish.com

Marisa Miller is still shooting in St. Bart’s for Victoria’s Secret, but this time she brought along a friend. A model friend. Selita Ebanks. Whoa. I see your game, Marisa. Is this some kind of elaborate plan to coax me into a threesome? Because it’s working. Really well.

Source: theblemish.com

The big news of the day is Marisa Miller did a bikini photo shoot at the beach and when she hopped into the ocean to take a swim, her top buckled under the pressure of her breasts. Bad news for Victoria’s Secret because now every girl with big tits knows that VS bikinis won’t be able to contain their amazing rack. Good news for me because now 70% less girls with big tits will be wearing bikinis. It’s true what they say. One man’s horrible misfortune is another man’s masturbatory gain. More after the jump.

Source: theblemish.com

Here’s Marisa Miller also at the Spike Video Game Awards show. I don’t get it. She’ll show up here willingly but when I tie her up in my basement, it’s all wild shrieking and uncontrollable sobbing. Jesus, woman. Calm down. I’m going to let you go. Eventually. I mean, I can’t possibly fit both you AND a dead hooker in my trunk.

Source: theblemish.com

Every year, Victoria’s Secret has their lingerie fashion show and every year I check my mailbox for an invite and every year I find a reminder from the court telling me to stay 500 yards away from all Victoria’s Secret models. Next year it’s going to be different. Watch out Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio, Ana Beatriz Barros, Heidi Klum, Selita Ebanks, Doutzen Kroes, Miranda Kerr, Izabel Goulart and all the rest. This sexy beast is coming for you. So, please, don’t warn the cops and don’t even try to hide your underwear. I’ll find it eventually. I’ve been practicing with my Where’s Waldo books. A few more after the jump or click any photo for the full gallery.

Source: theblemish.com

This was labeled as some sort of behind the scenes Victoria’s Secret bikini shoot featuring Marisa Miller, Alessadra Ambrosio, Adriana Lima and Karolina Kurkova. But I think we all know what’s really going on here. My fantasies have finally materialized! And once again, I’m on the outside looking in. Just like in my dreams.

More hotness after the jump.

Source: theblemish.com

I don’t know how they tricked Marisa Miller into getting naked for this photo shoot but I’m glad they did because BOOBIES!

Source: theblemish.com

Marisa Miller, Miranda Kerr and Heidi Klum all showed up for a Victoria’s Secret fitting in NY a few days ago. This should be a reminder for all of you to get your lotion and Kleenex and/or vibrators ready because the annual Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show is about a month away. I don’t want to ruin anything for you guys, but I hear they’ll be in their underwear.