Source: theblemish.com

Looks like Britney has a new man. The unwitting victim goes by the name Michael Marchand. Mr. Marchand works as a hospitality coordinator, what common folk call “waiter”. According to Life and Style:

“Brit instantly fell for Michael when she was at Mirabelle in early November. “Their chemistry was immediate. He’s very turned on by her,” says an insider.”

Aren’t people supposed to date up? Britney’s gone from Justin to K-Fed to random sex partners to this waiter. To think, we all used to joke about K-Fed. Look who’s laughing now.

According to Yelp and Mirabelle’s website, they serve fairly high-quality food with a classy atmosphere. Hold on, let me scan the menu.. yup, no mention of fried chicken and burgers. If eating involves utensils, count Britney out. Place a dinner fork in front of her and she would stare at you as if you had just pulled a sack of marbles out of your rectum.*

*I have tried this. Indeed, it is quite shocking and perplexing to people. Also quite messy. - Captain Swarthy

Source: theblemish.com

Here’s Cindy Crawford walking along the beach with her portly friend. I’m sure it must be easy for Cindy to convince others to do the heavy lifting. She can say stuff like, “Hey, why don’t you carry that luggage over there? You need the exercise. What? I’m just looking out for you,” or “Hey, fatty. Yea, you. Take my bag of beauty products, but don’t try to use them. They won’t work on you because not only are you tubby, you’re ugly.” I haven’t realized this until now, but Cindy Crawford is mean.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

Celebrities were out in LA yesterday to assist the Los Angeles homeless mission in serving an early Thanksgiving meal to the city’s homeless. Actors Kirk Douglas, Harrison Ford, Calista Flockhart and Nia Long were among the famous faces helping out and bringing attention to the cause.

Wearing red aprons and plastic gloves, they stood alongside volunteers at the annual feast at downtown’s Los Angeles Mission, doling out turkey drumsticks, mashed potatoes and gravy, rolls, vegetables and pumpkin pie.

Actresses Nia Long and Calista Flockhart and “The Hills” reality TV star Spencer Pratt were among others passing out almost 3,000 plates of food to lines of men, women and children.

“It’s very grounding,” said Long, who dished out vegetables and rolls with her 7-year-old son. “I feel grateful for all the things I have.”

A house band pounded out music as people sipped on bright green and orange punch at rows of tables outside.

[From The Huffington Post]

LA mayor Antonio Villaraigosa was there, and he actually washed homeless people’s feet as part of the event, getting down on his hands and knees to personally attend to the feet of the down-on-their-luck attendees. That’s an incredible gesture and I find it touching. One of the women whose feel Villaraigosa washed agrees. Yasmine Villalobos is quoted by Huffington Post as saying “He washed my feet, and it was so special. I will remember it forever.”

I love seeing 90 year-old screen legend Kirk Douglas out. He was most recently photographed looking incredibly surprised as John Travolta kissed him full on the mouth before presenting him with an award. Hopefully they’ll be plenty more photo ops for Mr. Douglas, and those pictures will soon fade from our collective memory.

Kirk Douglas has volunteered with the LA Mission for years, and helped establish their Anne Douglas Center for Women, named after his wife. Anne and Kirk Douglas oversaw the donation of ten computers to the center last summer. In a statement about the celebrities volunteering at the LA Mission on Thanksgiving, Douglas said “Their involvement will help their souls as much as it helps the guests being served.”

Have a great Thanksgiving everyone.

Shown below are Kirk Douglas, Harrison Ford, Calista Flockhart, Alana Curry, Spencer Pratt, Antonio Villaraigosa, Kate Linder, Nicholle Tom, Nia Long, Antonio Villaraigosa, and Calista Flockhart’s son, Liam. Thanks to PRPhotos.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

The details were initially hazy about the birth of Sacha Baron Cohen and his fiance Isla Fisher’s first baby last month. Reports in Fisher’s native Australia declared correctly that the pair had a girl, but the exact date and place of the birth was unknown. Later rumors had their baby a boy, with the name incorrectly given as “Sandler James.”

It turns out that the Borat comedian and his fiance did have a girl last month, and that her name is Olive. Instead of opting for a high-paid magazine reveal, the hilarious impersonator and his lovely girlfriend decided to let the paparazzi take pictures yesterday as they stood outside a hotel. They looked happy and relaxed, smiling and showing the baby. Their good friends Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber also decided to debut their newborn by letting photographers have unpaid access to pictures. Naomi showed off little Alexander Pete Schreiber to paparazzi when he was two weeks old.

Isla looks incredible, and their baby is so cute! Babies are so adorable at that age. I remember an elderly woman coming up to my husband and me when our son was a month old and telling us how fast it all went. Now that he’s three I realize how right she was.

Baron Cohen will next appear in the film Bruno, in which he dupes people with his alter ego, a flaming Austrian talk show host. Fisher says she intends to be a stay-at-home mom.

Thanks to Splash News for these pictures and The Daily Mail for the heads up.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

Britney has a new boyfriend, a waiter who must be willing to put up with the craziness in exchange for the massive publicity that goes along with it. Will he stay the course or cash out and sell his story quickly like Isaac Cohen did? Cohen was seen out with Britney this January, which was arguably her longest relationship this year. She was also linked with magician Criss Angel, but he quickly disappeared after her disastrous VMA performance. Late last year she had brief dalliances with producer JR Rotem and William Morris agent Jason Trawlick.

Maybe an average guy without ties to Hollywood is just what Britney needs. She was seen out with waiter Michael Marchand on November 21st on what may have been a date at the restaurant where he works, Mirabelle. When questioned about the relationship, Marchand played coy:

Brit, wearing black and dark sunglasses, and waiter Michael Marchand, dressed up in a shirt and tie, definitely caused quite a stir when they were spotted out together at Mirabelle restaurant, where Michael works, in LA on Nov. 21!

An eyewitness tells Life & Style, “Michael came in a little after midnight, and she came in right after. They were being discreet. Forty-five minutes later, they left the restaurant together. He was charming – he made Britney laugh and looked at her with this secret smile. They left in separate cars.”

Life & Style reports in its new issue that Brit instantly fell for Michael when she was at Mirabelle in early November. “Their chemistry was immediate. He’s very turned on by her,” says an insider. Since then, the two had at least one date at Brit’s mansion. “They’re always texting each other,” says the insider.

When Life & Style asked him about their romance, he said, smiling, “I can’t talk about that right now.”

[From Life and Style]

In related news, Britney has been seen with very prominent bruises on her upper thigh, which may support the claims that she had minimally-invasive laser-based liposuction, as the tabloids claimed last week.

There’s also a story that Britney’s family wants to send her to rehab again. She did fail a drug test, but that was chalked up to prescription medication. Dr. Drew Pinskey, who does not treat Britney, says she’s a drug addict and is in dire need of help.

Britney is shown in the header image out on 11/17, thanks to WENN. A picture of her with the new guy is available on the Life and Style website.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

18 year-old Heroes hottie and would-be dolphin saver Hayden Panetteire is probably no longer dating her older co-star, Milo Ventimiglia. Milo was said to have given Hayden a $1,950 gold ring for her birthday, and although the two claim to only be friends, who gives their opposite sex friends expensive jewelry like that?

Hayden has been spotted out on the town looking cosy with not one but two guys recently, Diana Ross’ son Evan and singer Ne-Yo. Maybe she’s just being flirty, or perhaps she’s trying to make Milo jealous, as neither seems to have moved into the realm of romance. Ne-Yo told People magazine he’s just friends with Hayden, and says they only met recently. He claims he was holding her hands to help her walk in her painful shoes, and he dismisses the romance rumors, saying they met doing charity work, that he barely knows her, and that she’s “silly”

“Hayden and I just met yesterday. We’ve only known each other for one day,” Ne-Yo told PEOPLE at the Ronald McDonald House Charity’s World Children’s Day event Tuesday, where Panettiere, 18, also made an appearance. “She was hanging out with some friends and invited me to come out.”

As for the hand holding, “I was helping her out of the car!” says the singer, 28. “She had these shoes – they were cute – but they were torture devices, so I had to help her.”

The duo only spent 48-hours together as they toured Ronald McDonald Houses in Dallas, Detroit, Philadelphia, and New York, but they definitely hit it off. “I’m a fan of Hayden’s show Heroes, so I was excited to know she was going to do this with me,” the singer continued. “Hayden is cool people. She’s a little silly. But silly is good.”

[From People.com]

R&B singer Ne-Yo said he would help Hayden on her first album, which is in progress, and that they’ve talked about a possible collaboration.

Meanwhile Hayden was quite friendly with Evan Ross at a recent party:

“Heroes” star Hayden, 18, spotted the hunky 20-year-old [Evan Ross] and headed straight for him at a party in Los Angeles on November 13, an eyewitness tells The Enquirer.

“The were sitting really close to each other and looked very flirty, whispering in each other’s ears and giggling,” said the eyewitness…

And while Hayden’s rep says she and Evan are just friends, the eyewitness adds: “You could tell they were really enjoying each other’s company…”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, December 3, 2007]

Good for her. Hayden’s not heading off to hotel rooms or drinking herself into oblivion, she’s engaged in some harmless flirting at parties and while doing charity work. I used to find Hayden annoying and didn’t cover her for a long time. She was rumored to be personally calling the paps to tip them off as to her whereabouts, and she seemed to be desperate for attention last year, showing up at all the hot spots. She seems to have matured quite a bit this year.

Hayden was named “obsession of the year” by GW Magazine, and denies a relationship with her co-star Milo Ventimiglia in the accompanying interview. She says that there are rumors that she’s dating every man she hangs out with, and says that it’s fine with her if she’s rumored to be dating Hollywood elite, including women. Here are the photos from the issue, thanks to PopSugar. Thanks to Splash News for the header photo of Hayden and Ne-Yo.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

There’s a lot of mean things I’ll say about Tom Cruise. Most of them I won’t publish, but I’ll say a whole lot of defamatory things about him when no lawyers are around to hear it. Apparently In Touch magazine has a pretty similar rumor. They’ve gone all-out and hired an investigator to look into Tom Cruise’s sexuality. And you’ll be shocked by what they found. I’m talking scraping your jaw off the floor.

The magazine’s headline reads “FINALLY THE TRUTH.” And we all know how the Scientologist are fans of free speech and really encourage speaking the truth, especially when it comes to their golden boy. Or should I saw paid spokeswhore. Not shockingly, In Touch’s highly respected private detective (a former porn star, no less) has come to the irrefutable conclusion that Tom’s straight as an arrow. An arrow that’s pointing at another guy’s butt.

He’s been married three times and has also been romantically linked with some of Hollywood’s most desirable women. Yet for nearly his entire career, Tom Cruise has been subject to pervasive rumors that he’s gay. Though Tom’s camp has repeatedly denied the talk, it has persisted over the years, with two men even claiming to have had affairs with him — tales which Tom was willing to challenge in a court of law. Now, after conducting an extensive investigation of the gay rumors, porn star-turned-private investigator Paul Barresi is speaking to In Touch about his findings. “Everything I’ve found and everything I know points to Tom being heterosexual,” Paul tells In Touch.

[From In Touch]

Not surprisingly, In Touch is making us wait until the issue hits the stands to learn all the reasons Tom is straight. I’m guessing it’s going to be like “He’s been married 3 times. Only straight men marry women.” “He likes boobs.” “Scientology loves gay people – if Tom were gay, he’d be open about it.” Tom’s just too… something. It’s hard to put your finger on. It’s not like he actively shows any of the stereotypical traits we’ve come to associate with gay people. There’s just something artificial about the way he interacts with women he’s supposedly sexually interested in. While I love Nicole Kidman, I could maybe excuse that one – she seems a little cold. But Katie Holmes? I wouldn’t kick her out of bed, and I’m a straight woman. Or maybe not. Maybe they should send this former porn star detective after me, and see what my issues are. Something tells me Tom was able to bribe Paul Barresi with things only Tom can provide. Wait was Barresi a gay porn star? Let’s go with yes, that makes this funnier. So happy Thanksgiving, and Tom Cruise is not gay. That’s almost as good as extra mashed potatoes.

Important Note by Celebitchy: This story is a complete turnaround from earlier claims by Baressi. The guy wrote a book, segments of which were published online in September 2006, saying that he spoke with a male hooker who had a bizarre wrestling jerk-off session with Tom in the late 90s toward the end of his relationship with Kidman. We covered this extensively at the time.

Then a guy claiming to be the hooker who wrestled with Tom Cruise contacted me and we had an extended e-mail exchange. He was extremely wary of telling his story and never did in the end, just giving vague statements that Baressi’s account, which again at that time was that Cruise was indeed gay or at least had gay experiences, was not true.

So the hooker guy, who was reluctant and could not be convinced to tell his story, e-mailed me and made hints that it didn’t happen that way and that Cruise wasn’t gay. (Believe me, I wish it went the other way with this guy, but it didn’t. It’s possible he was a plant by someone, but he was so evasive with me, and so unprofessional about it, that I would say he just got scared in the end and didn’t tell the whole story, which he suggested was less incriminating toward Tom.)

I spent a week e-mailing with a guy who claims to be “Big Red,” the male hooker that supposedly had a rather tame gay wrestling romp with Tom in the late 90s. The guy didn’t tell me his story and I kept e-mailing with him back and forth, hoping that he would write something I could publish.

He claimed that the story told by another guy, Barresi that we published here was inaccurate, and that it didn’t go down like it was claimed, but the guy wasted my time and didn’t give any details. Here’s the relevant part of our e-mail exchange. Again, I cannot verify that this is the person he claims to be or that this is anything more than a person who strung me along via e-mail for a week, but here’s what he said:

———————————
Segment of one e-mail toward the end of our exchange: I just do not think the story I have to tell is what you are looking for but I will think about it.

Another e-mail: I am actually looking to build Tom Cruise up not break him down

Last one I received: I’m not getting a good vibe from this at the moment – - I think I will wait and I may neveer publish the real story – - afterall, I believe in Karma and Barresi will have to deal with his.
———————————
It sounds like whatever happened, it was even less sensational than was claimed, at least according to this person who contacted me and got my hopes up about running this big exclusive. (I even contacted a lawyer and a cult expert about how to proceed, which may be why he got a bad vibe. You can’t be too careful with the c0s.) This guy claims to live in Europe now. The book by Barresi says that he left the states after the news of his supposed romp with Cruise got out, but I can’t be certain what’s true at this point. Tom Cruise is weird and is involved in a harmful freaky cult, but whether he actually had a gay wrestling session is up to question.

[I wrote this, it was originally published on Celebitchy in November, 2006]

So now this same guy Baressi is all “Oh, Tom Cruise isn’t gay.” What happened?

Meanwhile Cruise biographer Andrew Morton, who has a supposedly explosive unauthorized biography of Cruise coming out this January, has sold his house and is now in an undisclosed location after extensive harassment by Scientology thugs defending Tom’s character. Perhaps Baressi was engaged in a little character-saving PR of his own, if he’s so quick to switch his story. Maybe the hooker guy was right and it was never true in the first place. Either way, I’ll be reading Mr. Morton’s book with wide-eyed interest.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

Every day you hear a few oddball stories. They’re great water cooler fodder – but the really odd ones are normally about people you’ve never head of. Some guy in Oregon gets his hand eaten off by a wild squirrel. A 74-year-old lady in England walks 384 miles naked. To be fair, you do hear some almost unbelievable stories about Britney Spears, but she’s the exception to the rule. Well Britney and Mike Tyson. Mike’s life is almost impossible to follow anymore. I tried looking up his criminal history on Wikipedia and found myself so overwhelmed that I’m not even going to bother any of you with it. It won’t help your turkey go down any faster. Mike’s currently doing a one day stint in the slammer after pleading guilty to cocaine possession and driving under the influence. Tough punishment, I know. Before you’re filled with righteous indignation as I (almost) was, take note: Mike has been forced to wear pink undergarments in jail. By the sheriff. Do you think the guy is trying to encourage prison rape? Because I thought sheriffs were supposed to prevent crimes.

The final humiliation for the one-time “baddest man on the planet” came yesterday courtesy of Joe Arpaio, the self-styled toughest sheriff in America who believes pink has a psychological calming effect. Mr. Arpaio, who has vowed to make an example of law-breakers in Phoenix, Arizona, also obliged the former heavyweight boxing champion to wear pink underwear under his prison stripes.

Unsurprisingly, 41-year-old Tyson – who had been jailed for a day after admitting charges of possessing cocaine and driving under the influence – looked anything but amused when he reported to Tent City, an infamous open-air jail near a dog pound and a rubbish dump. The sentence, on top of 360 hours of community service, followed the fallen fighter’s arrest in his BMW after leaving a nightclub last Christmas.

But it could have been worse. Had Tyson, who has served prison terms for rape and assault, been jailed for longer he might have had to endure another of Mr Arpaio’s pet punishments – the chain gang.

[From the Daily Mail]

Sheriff Joe Arpaio pretty much spits in the face of the concept of restorative justice. And I have to say that, when it comes to Mike Tyson, I’m cool with that. So when your family is squabbling this Thanksgiving and you’re sitting there wondering if it’s cool to fake an illness and/or jump out a window just to get the hell away, and it seems like you will never experience happiness or joy in your life again (is that just me?) think of Mike Tyson in his pink lacies, and remember that there is still good in the world.

Picture Note by JayBird: Image thanks to the Daily Mail.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

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Source: www.celebitchy.com

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