Source: theblemish.com

Britney Spears will now blame her inhaler for her “false positive” drug test. Originally, the narcolepsy drug, Provigil, was blamed for the positive result. TMZ quickly debunked that myth by confirming that Provigil would not show up on a court-ordered drug test. Now a source says Albuterol, an asthma drug, is the culprit. Ah ha?! Not so fast says TMZ.

But, again, we checked and Albuterol is not an amphetamine, and the class of drug that showed up on the test was an amphetamine.

Well, Britney does look like she’d have an asthma attack going up a wheelchair access ramp. So… sure? I guess? I mean, as long as we’re doing some creative brainstorming, why not say someone spiked her inhaler, which is oddly shaped like a pipe and made out of glass, with meth. But, if they really wanted to stick with that narcolepsy thing, they could have just said she was taking Desoxyn. It would be perfect since Desoxyn is a type of amphetamine that treats narcolepsy, ADD/ADHD and exogenous obesity. All of which Britney is likely to have.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

Some people are so delusional that it’s sad, like Britney Spears thinking she’s not crazy and/or a good mother. Then others are so delusional that it’s funny. Case in point: Joe Francis says that his incarceration is “One of the Greatest Miscarriages of Justice Ever.” I’ll wait while you stop choking with laughter. The man who got famous getting girls drunk and filming their boobies landed in jail last May when he decided he should make millions but not have to pay taxes on it. And you know what that is? That’s a miscarriage of justice! How dare Joe Francis be held to the same standards as the rest of us? It’s an outrage! Poor Joe! He only has a view of a 7-11. A 7-11 he can’t even go to. Can you believe that if you break the law, the government will actually take your freedom away? What is wrong with the world? [Shakes fists at the Heavens].

He attended lavish parties, dated Paris Hilton and counted Brad Pitt and Justin Timberlake as fans of his Girls Gone Wild franchise. But times have changed for Joe Francis — the 34-year-old, self-made multimillionaire. Since May, he’s been cooped up in a 12×7 cell at Reno’s Washoe County Jail for tax evasion charges.

“I can’t look out the window,” he tells Extra in an interview, airing Monday. “The only thing I can see is the 7-11 across the street, that’s too depressing for me. I try not the think about anything on the outside.” Francis could pay his $1.5 million bond as he awaits a federal trial slated for next year. But then he would face extradition to Florida, where he was jailed for a month in April for contempt of court in a civil suit brought by seven women who alleged they were underage when he shot them for his raunchy videos. (The federal charges had superceded the civil ones.) A judge refuses to grant him bail.

“I’m being persecuted by people in Florida, corrupt city officials, who’re pissed off at me for asserting my First Amendment right against them,” he told Extra. Francis compared himself to Hustler’s Larry Flynt, adding, “I’m obviously the target because I’m the figurehead of the company … I’m being persecuted for my stance on the First Amendment.”

[From Us Weekly]

Joe I think they’re pissed off at you for asserting that you don’t need to follow the same laws as everyone else. It has nothing to do with freedom of speech or desire to film a lot of boobies. Film away, asshat. But pay your taxes on it. Seriously, few things give me more satisfaction than knowing exactly what’s happening to you in prison right now as we speak. You know what else is a miscarriage of justice Joe? I’m going to go outside now. Because I can. And then I’m going to go to 7-11, and instead of just looking at it, I’m going to go inside and get a Slurpee. And I’m going to drink it, and relish the fact that you can’t. And then I’m going to go walk 13 feet without having to turn around, and relish the fact that you can’t do that, either. Hope you like prison nipples!

Source: www.celebitchy.com

Remember last April when Boy George tried to have his way with a male prostitute? Yeah I know you’ve blocked it out of your mind and tried to plunge it into the deepest recesses of your psyche, but there it is. Boy George and a friend found a male prostitute on Gaydar.com, got the guy to go back to George’s place, then chained him up. The petrified prostitute (that’s my favorite alliteration EVER) managed to break free and run to the police station. I have this image of a man running through the streets of London wearing only a leather harness and dragging chains behind him. Okay, now try to plunge that image into the deepest recesses of your psyche.

George has now been charged with false imprisonment.

Boy George was charged Tuesday with falsely imprisoning a 28-year-old man, the Associated Press reports. The Culture Club singer, 47, was arrested in May after allegedly chaining a Norwegian male escort to a wall in his London flat.

Auden Carlsen told London’s Daily Mail that he met Boy George on the website Gaydar and agreed to go back to his flat to take photographs. Carlsen claimed that George then pulled out a box of whips and sex toys and told him, “Now you’ll get what you deserve,” and tied him up.

“I was convinced I was going to die,” Carlsen told the paper. He said he yanked the hook off the wall and fled to the police.

This isn’t Boy George’s first run-in with the law: He was ordered to sweep the streets of NYC as part of his community service after pleading guilty to falsely reporting a burglary at his NYC pad. Police found cocaine instead. Boy George is due in court in London November 22.

[From Us Weekly]

I wonder how Boy George will plea. You would think he’d want this to go away as quickly and as quietly as possible. If he pleas, he could probably avoid jail time… and I’m guessing going to jail on a charge like this wouldn’t be pretty. Although considering the kind of stuff Boy George is into, it might be just what he wants. I have no idea if that joke even applies to British jails. Somehow I imagine the inmates are more polite and drink tea with their pinkies in the air. But something tells me there will be less of that and more “beating the crap out of the guy who got ‘Karma Chameleon’ stuck into our heads for nine years.” And now it’s stuck in my head again. Damn it.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s a photo of the male prostitute, Auden Carlsen. I don’t know why George would think he couldn’t get a guy like that without paying him.

Source: evilbeetgossip.com

Talk about not letting the fame go to your head.

14-year-old Taylor Momsen, who stars as Jenny Humphrey on Gossip Girl, recently attended her high school’s homecoming dance, even though she is not currently attending classes there.

She wore a black lace tunic (”way too short for a dress,” says a witness) and spent most of the night “huddled” with a gaggle of friends.

Tragically, the writer’s strike has shut down production on Gossip Girl, so it’s a good thing Momsen’s not being a snotty brat to these kids — she may be back in school with them soon enough.

Source: evilbeetgossip.com

“I’m just glad I don’t have to deal with all the drama. I mean, it’s fun to watch, but I’m glad it’s not my life. I’m actually a drama-free person.”

Heidi Montag, to Blender magazine.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

I’m not sure if any definitive gossip has ever come out about Ryan Phillippe’s split with Reese Witherspoon. A lot of people said he’d been having an affair with his co-star at the time, Abbie Cornish. But there were also reports that Reese was incredibly controlling and Ryan’s family was relieved when the two split. I’m still going with the whole, “Her career was going a lot better than his and it ruined their relationship” bit. Despite all that, Ryan’s given an interview to Man About Town magazine in which he says the breakup was so hard from him he was physically ill and wanted to kill himself.

The debut issue of Man About Town grabbed my attention the other day at the newsstand. Specifically, it was the cover blurb, “Ryan Phillippe: A 44-Page Portfolio.” Considering Phillippe is a rather private celeb, I just had to see what this new British magazine—which I had never heard of—had on Reese Witherspoon’s ex-husband. Lemme tell you, it’s Phillippe like never before. There are dozens of photos and what I think is probably Phillippe’s most revealing interview.

“After the divorce I was a physical wreck,” says Phillippe. “I wanted to die. I was ready to kill myself. I was not taking care of myself at all. I would wake up and cry and vomit.”

But now, Phillippe says, he uses the pain in his work. “Now, it’s f–king easy,” he says, when asked how he gets himself to cry in a film. “When I was younger, I didn’t have enough to cry about. But since I’ve had kids, I feel my work has become better, because my life is fuller and more complicated, and I’ve experienced so many highs and lows.”

[From E! News]

That’s really sad. I guess I am a little surprised, I thought Phillippe came off as kind of a jerk. Probably because I assumed all the rumors about him not being happy for Reese’s success were true. If there were any truth to it, it was probably more that he wished his career were doing as well, not that he wanted her to do poorly. Vomiting seems to be the way that Ryan has traditionally dealt with breakups. I read a story years ago that after he and Reese filmed their breakup scene in “Cruel Intentions” that Ryan threw up several times. At the time it was all romantic, because just the thought of breaking up with her made him sick. But apparently it was a sad indication of things to come. Whoever thought vomiting could be romantic?

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Ryan and Reese at the “Walk the Line” premiere at the AFI festival on November 3rd, 2005. Header image at the New York premiere on November 13th. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Source: evilbeetgossip.com

Her camp is trying to spin this eight ways from Sunday — including throwing out the Hail Mary that this shit is somehow the result of an inhaler – but it’s all bullshit.

Homegirl’s snorting meth.

How bourgeois.

Source: theblemish.com

I present to you my solution to world hunger. Christina Aguilera. Specifically. Christina Aguilera’s lactating breasts. She could feed Ethiopia with those sweater puppies. WHO would write about her in journals like she was Jesus Christ. “And the streets were bathed in milk. Not one family would go hungry again.” You know those Girls Gone Wild commercials where women rub themselves and try to act sexy while their thin white t-shirts are being doused with water? I imagine that’s what her baby will be doing with her breast milk.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

We already knew that Tom Cruise was a big ball of crazy. So crazy, in fact, that nothing you say about him is really all that surprising to people anymore. And that’s sort of a letdown, to be honest. “Tom Cruise eats the flesh of living baby birds” or “Tom Cruise has a tree in his backyard made from human skin that he uses in his ritual sacrifices” or “Tom Cruise said he was going to eat Suri’s placenta.” That last one is actually true, though he claimed after the fact that he was joking. One thing Tom can never be accused of joking about is Scientology. Xenu’s favorite son has been proselytizing for years, and it’s gotten to the point where he’s so rabid and crazy and drooling that we don’t pay any attention to him anymore.

But famous biographer Andrew Morton has decided to take a much deeper look into Tom Cruise’s psyche than any of the rest of us would ever be comfortable with. I imagine discovering the inner workings of Tom’s brain would kind of be like that movie “The Cell” – sort of like a Salvador Dali painting brought to life. You must just want to run away. But Morton – who is known as a very thorough researcher and has written the authoritative biography of Princess Diana – has managed to write a book about Cruise that is anticipated will expose a lot of the skeletons in Cruise’s closet.

Unfortunately (but not surprisingly) Morton is being hounded by Scientology thugs, likely dispatched at the behest of Cruise.

FORMER tabloid royal reporter Andrew Morton – author of revealing books on Princess Diana, Monica Lewinsky and Madonna – has run into serious trouble with his latest subject, Hollywood star Tom Cruise. Dewsbury-born Morton, 54, says he has been forced to sell his flat in London and go “underground” because of aggressive pressure to drop the bio­graphy from Cruise’s associates in the Church of Scientology. “I have received threats from the Scientologists and things have become pretty heavy – to the extent that it’s almost more than my lawyers can ­handle,” Morton tells me. “I’ve sold my flat and I’m not telling anyone where I’m moving to. I intend to disappear for a while.”

Cruise was said to be furious to learn that Morton was investigating his love life, the rumors about his sexuality and his involvement with Scientology. The cult was founded by sci-fi author L Ron Hubbard in 1954 and holds that humans are descended from an exiled race of aliens called Thetans. Similar attempts to reveal the extent of Cruise’s links with Scientology have been abandoned by American journalists after heavy-handed warnings from the cult, whose Hollywood members include John Travolta and Lisa Marie Presley.

Cruise has always been sensitive about criticism over his involvement with the movement, to which he gives considerable financial support. He also insisted actress Katie Holmes, join the religion before they married last year. Compared to Morton’s success with his first Diana book (from which he made millions thanks to the Princess’s collaboration) his project on Cruise is proving far more problematic. When Morton was in Toronto to meet sources who knew Cruise from when he filmed Cocktail in the city, he was overheard complaining that, compared with the Church of Scientology “reporting on the Royal Family was a walk in Hyde Park”.

[From the Daily Express]

I have to say – whatever the Scientologists are doing – if it’s too much for lawyers, they must be going really, really far. I’m assuming they’re drowning them in paperwork or something. But they must be doing a lot more to Morton personally if he’s selling his home and going into hiding. You generally don’t do that over lawsuits run amok.

As much as we joke about Scientology, it is a dangerous cult/religion/whatever you want to call it. There have been reports of Scientologists kidnapping members who tried to leave, and making them go to Scientology boot camps to be reprogrammed. There are too many claims to go into, but here’s a quick example of one case, which led to a lot of legal trouble.

Scientology killed Lisa McPherson in Clearwater, Florida, on December 5, 1995. She was held against her will for 17 days, denied medical care, and forcibly sedated. When her guards tried to force her to undergo the Introspection Rundown and she refused, she was kept in an isolation lock-down until she died from severe dehydration. Forensic entomologists later identified 110 cockroach feeding sites on her body, and three nationally prominent forensic pathologists opined that the manner of death was “homicide”. (The pathologists were Calvin Bandt, M.D. (affidavit), Werner Spitz, M.D. (affidavit), and John Coe, M.D.)

[From Carnegie Mellon]

If I were Morton, I’d be scared too. Freedom of the press is not a value the Scientologists hold highly. Though I’m sure if he gets his book out, it’ll get a lot of press, make him a lot of money, and be pretty interesting. He might find himself chained up in a basement at some point, but I’m sure Tom Cruise will have nothing to do with that.

Source: www.celebitchy.com

The shocking death of Kanye West’s mother has made worldwide headlines, with many people trying to figure out what possibly could have happened. Donda West, 58, had reportedly gone under the knife for a breast reduction and a tummy tuck. The surgery, performed by Dr. Jan Adams, was supposed to take four hours, but instead took nearly eight, prompting a lot of speculation about what actually went wrong during the surgery. CelebTV.com reported that the California Medical Board has attempted to revoke Dr. Adams’s board certification recently due to several DUI arrests in the last few years. It’s not possible to say if Donda died as a result of a previously existing medical issue, or if something went wrong during the surgery, or if something was wrong with the surgeon himself.

Rap star Kanye West’s mother, Donda West, had a tummy tuck and breast reduction performed by cosmetic surgeon Dr. Jan Adams before her death, according to the Web site TMZ.com. Adams told TMZ that he was not responsible for her death, but that she may have died from a heart attack, pulmonary embolism or massive vomiting.

Another plastic surgeon, Andre Aboolian, told ABC News that West consulted him for surgery, too, but he deemed her a health risk and wouldn’t operate unless she got clearance from an internist. Aboolian said he “insisted that she see an internist before he would entertain the surgery because she had a condition that could have caused a heart attack.”

Adams also told TMZ that West consulted with him over a period of four months, often changing her mind about the surgery, according to an article on the site.

[From ABC News]

A lot of people seem to view plastic surgery is pretty safe these days because it’s so common, it’s elective, and it’s advertised everywhere. Somehow it makes it seem like it’s not “real” surgery – which it absolutely is. Just because the surgery might be for something superficial (versus heart or brain surgery) doesn’t make surgery in and of itself superficial. It’s still complicated, and you’re still being cut into or opened up. It’s not something to be entered into lightly, and it sounds like Donda definitely took that into consideration, since she changed her mind several times.

Nearly 200 people die every year from plastic surgery complications. Today, about 2 million cosmetic procedures are done in the United States each year. That’s a startling 446 percent increase in cosmetic surgeries since 1997.

This is in part because “procedures are much safer, more readily available and more affordable,” said Dr. Allen D. Rosen, spokesperson for the American Society of Plastic Surgery (ASPS).

Death as a result from cosmetic plastic surgery is relatively uncommon, however. Only about one out of every 60,000 surgeries result in death, according to ASPS. But like any surgery, there are potential risks involved. The most notorious case, perhaps, is that of best-selling author Olivia Goldsmith, 54, author of “The First Wives’ Club.” Goldsmith, who frequently wrote about Botox sessions and routinely going under the knife, ultimately died as a result of one of her many cosmetic procedures. Comedian Kathy Griffin admitted she had to be rushed to the emergency room after a liposuction procedure.

[From ABC News]

One would think that a celebrity would go to the very best cosmetic surgeons out there – and they’re still no exception to complications and death. You hear a lot of horror stories about women going overseas for discount medical procedures, or random people offering Botox in their basements in Queens, and then someone ends up dead. Most people have the sense to avoid those situations, but we forget that, even if we take all the right precautions, there’s still an inherent risk you’re taking on. Hopefully Kanye and his family will find some peace.